ahhhhh hahahahahaaa! My gym final was canceled, it's my last day, so I came home and brought Kara with me. That's when Josh dropped by with Tony, there's nothing wrong with that, I love Tony to death, but I'm a selfish greedy bitch and I don't want to have to share Josh.

We went to Wal Mart I held his hand on the way in, and continued to touch him the rest of the day. Ya know what? he does have a nice bod! I wouldn't mind a piece of that.... Great body, great mind, what's not to love?? But no, he's not ready. I'm really not sure about the whole thing, that's all I know. I know that I'm madly in love with him, and he wants nuffin to do with me. But I can't just forget about him, he's absolutely amazing. I know that he wants to do something with his life, and I'm the one who encouraged him, and told him, you can be anything you want to be, and you can make a difference, I don't want to "tie him down" as he put it and take away his dreams, but I can't live without him, I'm completely hooked.

Today was the first day I was really comfortable around him, I could not have been anymore all over him!! There were sometimes when he seemed as though he wanted me to just get the hell away from him, like when we were getting Tony's flowers, then we'd get back in the car and be hand in hand the whole way home. I just don't know. I know that I'm completely infatuated by him, and he keeps calling, so I'm not going to stop. I thought that maybe once he knew how much I really cared for him, he'd maybe think differently, but I don't think it's gonna work that way, or he'd be mine. right? maybe I'm trying too hard to get his affection. maybe we're meant to be only friends, but then, an old quote always comes to mind:

::How can you just be friends with someone, if every time you look at them, it makes you want them even more::

PEACE

<��||��>

� PAST MEMORIES
RIP Bryan - Wednesday, Aug. 20, 2003
I'm being stalked again! - Tuesday, Aug. 19, 2003
I'm back. - Monday, Aug. 18, 2003
Gail, the bitch. - Monday, Aug. 18, 2003
Rahhhhh!!!!!!!!! - Sunday, Aug. 17, 2003